Stop Trying to Escape Yourself
Around my 30th birthday back in 2021 (almost a year ago) I began to feel these pulses of deep change. Deeper than what I have previously experienced, as much of my experiences were focused on outer change where this pulse felt deeply inward. I tried to resist it, if I am being honest here I was fucking tired, tired of change, tired of processing, tired of riding waves of joy and than deep feelings of grief. But running away from myself even when facing myself was challenging was what I spent the past 10 years shifting away from, so inward I went.
In this space I found myself in the most nurturing and sometimes trying spaces of stillness I have ever experienced. It was beautiful, it was healing, it showed me the courage within myself I lost touch with. Ah but there were days when I wanted it to be over because it didn’t feel beautiful, it didn’t feel healing, it made me feel weak.
I share this openly because I know how frustrating and disheartening it can sometimes be to feel like giving up, to wanting to walk away from the parts of you and your experience that are challenging. I share this openly so you can know that you get stronger and more courageous through these challenges. This is when it becomes easy. Not because life gets easier and all of a sudden all your problems disappear. It gets easy because you now know how to hold more of yourself and love yourself through challenges.
So in a moment when I wanted to give up, when I wanted to walk away, when I couldn’t deal with the feelings of anger, frustration and worry, I turned to the Akashic Records one of my favorite resources of healing and guidance. I rarely ever record when I am reading for myself but something told me to. I stumbled upon this recording and the message was so healing and so relevant at this time (we have 6 planets in retrograde and the collective energy feels at many pressure points of change) it feels important to share with you.
This is a message about loving ourselves now no matter what our outer circumstances and inward feelings may be. Since it is a channeled message from the Akashic Records there are healing codes in this recording. If you are feeling a disconnect from who you are right now I highly recommend listening to this by creating a soothing loving environment for yourself. Let the emotions be ignited and flow through you and if you feel called journaling afterwards to help you process I will share some questions you can sit with below this audio.
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